When dealing with people, we try to understand their intentions as well as our own. What are they trying to say, why are they saying it, what do they want, and how do their intentions align with my own? People have many reasons for doing something. Some intentions can be spoken or unspoken and they can be conscious or unconscious.

By knowing your true intentions and those of the other party, you can save yourself a lot of money and grief. This is especially true in relationships having to do with contracts, partnerships, marriage and litigation. Understanding your true motivation for doing something because there are consequences to every action that you take.

For example, the popular saying is that people marry for love. But marriage is a legally binding contract so what does love have to do with it? Laws govern the legal status of a married couple and they also govern their obligations after a divorce, like alimony and child support.

A rich and successful business man marries a very beautiful woman. After the honeymoon is over, tensions begin to rise and cracks appear in the relationship. The husband is always working late, the wife ignores him when he is at home and all she does is go shopping.

They claimed they married for love, but that was not their true intentions. The man wanted a “trophy” wife to show his friends and society that he has “made” it. The woman wanted someone to take care of her in the lifestyle she would like to become accustom to for the rest of her life. Although neither had expressed their true intentions to the other, they both got want they wanted from the marriage.

Understanding the true intentions of the parties creates the basis for a more realistic and long lasting relationship. It improves your peace of mind, knowing your are getting the benefit of your bargain, and it allows you to change your experience in the relationship if you so choose.